Monday, August 09, 2004

Am I A Goth?

The Mistress of Source posted the following questionaire from a Catholic church on a registration required forum on an independent filmmakers site, thus I reproduce it here:

If Your Child is a Gothic, Reform Through the Lord!

Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your child may have gone astray from the Lord.

Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure and often dangerous culture that young teenagers are prone to participating in. The gothic culture leads young, susceptible minds into an imagined world of evil, darkness, and violence. Please seek immediate attention through counselling, prayer, and parental guidance to rid your child of Satan's temptations if five or more of the following are applicable to your child:

-Frequently wears black clothing.
Yes.

-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.

-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nailpolish.

-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include: reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other Satanic worshipping symbols.

-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.

-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)

I listen to pretty much anything by RUSH.

-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.

Yes. Gamers.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the Bible, prayer, church or sports.

Yes. I'm an atheist who hasn't sat through a football game since the Vikings lost the Super Bowl for the fourth time.

-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult, witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.

I ran a Dungeons and Dragons session based on Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

I was told that it was fun and don't do it again.

-Takes drugs.

-Drinks alcohol.

Um, yes.

-Is suicidal and/or depressed.

I had a Traveller character commit suicide once.

When borrowed a Skorpion machine pistol from another character he was told, "here, it shoots a bit to the left."
-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation. (This is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God and, His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local mental health center.)

-Complains of boredom.

Well, duhhhhh!
-Sleeps too excessively or too little.
Constantly.
-Is excessively awake during the night.

-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)

-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.

-Spends large amounts of time alone.

-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your chid may speak to evil sprits through meditation.)

-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.
All yes.
-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are but a few examples of this.
It's that atheism thing again.
-Misbehaves at school.
On occasion.
-Misbehaves at home.

-Eats excessively or too little.
Well, I do tend to pig-out when I can afford it.
-Eats goth-related foods. Count Chocula cereal is an example of this.

-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and should be stopped immediately.)

-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)
The History Channel.
-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.
God games like Civilization and Alpha Centauri.
-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.
Well double-plus duhhhhh!
-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.

-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.

-Expresses an interest in sex.
See previous answer.
-Masturbates
Duhhh to the duhhhh power!
-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.

-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism,
Scientology, Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.
What? Don't tell me that Objectivism is okay with you guys.

You haven't lived until you've performed an Objectivist fire drill in traffic.
-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various phrases: "I'm so gothic, I'm dead", "woe is me", "I'm a goth".

-Claims to be a goth.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene
immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your local mental health center.

~St. Mary's Catholic Church
Don't tell Mom. okay?

6 comments:

chewycloud said...

I'm sorry to tell you this but you copied all that from a parody or 'pretend' website most likely made by a goth to see how far people would go with its fake information.

Anonymous said...

the Christian culture has a history of torturing those who are not like that mindless, mannequin-esque mindstate. It is the Christians who need to be feared due to their subjective interpretations of the so called "word".

You have no idea what Goth is about. It is Christians who came up with this whole SATAN concept. If any of you Christians would READ and see where your practices and cultures come from, you'd see they were mostly stolen from Earth based Spiritual practitioners.

The Lords Angel said...

People can believe what they want and do what they want.

( and goths don't worship satan)

Anonymous said...

1. what kid doesnt play video games
2. what kid dosnt go on the internet
3. WTF nobody drinks blood(apparently we are now blood thirsty vampires).
4.eats!!!!!! every body is different. and i bet you eat. I know i eat alot and i only weigh 90 pounds.
5.misbehaves. MY little sister misbehaves and you dont see my parents talking to the preacher
6. request time alone. I bet you as a parent want to have time alone....well better go call the church my mommys having sex.
7.complains of boredom. Everybody gets bored. Not just goths
8.there is a difference between emo and goth.
9. oooh your teenager swears well so do i.
10. band and rock t shirts your religion is wrong. everyone likes music. and i am a christian.


Ok i just had to vent.....srry if i made u mad. but this crap pisses me off.
8.

Anonymous said...

I am soo for the last comment written on here!! Whoever wrote this doesn't have a clue what goths are like and the statements are so wrong that it's stupidly funny like "shakes head to violent music" are you kidding me??
There are tons of Christian bands that are heavy metal and do this such as Devil Wears Prada, Red, Skillet and "masturbates"? come on? an estimated 97% of people in this friggin world do so wheter they admit it or not!! This is just stupid..Not all goths are into satan though some might be like any other people..I myself am a Christian and I consider myself to be a goth and reading these statements is totally insulting. I am not what this claims to be

Leslie Bates said...

Just a question for everyone: Is anyone here under the impression that I'm some form of Christian?

That thought bugs me.