Wednesday, July 30, 2003

Shameless Conservative Comedy

From The Lemon:

President Carter to Travel To N. Korea, Bush Administration Negotiating for them to Keep Him

President Carter has announced a desire to travel to North Korea in an effort to aid in peace talks with the troubled nation. The Bush Administration announced strong support for the move, saying, "Based on his efforts in the past, we doubt he will have any positive impact on the disarmament negotiations, but we are willing to allow North Korea's nuclear program if they agree to keep him."

Added Bush, "Those two ought to get along great. Both of them led their nations to economic ruin while enacting disastrous foreign policy. Plus, they both suffer from delusions of mediocrity and seem to have this confused look all the time. Also, they are both socialites. In fact, I'm glad Kim [Il-Jong] wears the glasses, or else I couldn't tell these two apart."

The administration has revealed privately that they believe that with the aid of Carter's advice, North Korea will be out of business by early next week.

Could it be because you're a bottom feeding [expletive] Al?

Sharpton Fights for Equal Footing

Associated Press Writer

July 30, 2003, 5:34 PM EDT

WASHINGTON -- Al Sharpton said Wednesday he's tired of the notion that there are two tiers of candidates in the Democratic presidential race.

Sharpton questioned why Sens. John Edwards of North Carolina and Bob Graham of Florida are considered top-tier candidates and he is not, even though they are polling at about the same level.

Sharpton said they may have more money than he does, but he thinks it's dangerous for America if elections are determined by money. Edwards has raised $11.9 million, Graham $3.1 million and Sharpton $137,415, according to the latest campaign finance reports.

"If we are going by polls and money, why even have an election?" he told the audience, mostly interns working on Capitol Hill this summer. "Let's just declare Bush the winner.

"I'd rather take my pennies to bring Bush down than be intimidated."

Tuesday, July 29, 2003

And In The Friendly Skies

We the people are the department of homeland security, you know. I carry my laptop on flights just in case I need it to whack a terrorist on the head with - even if I don't need it along for business.

-- Bill Hobbs, July 29, 2003

Meanwhile At The Dissident Frogman's House

From the Dissident Frogman's Blog

Talking about Leatherface, I noticed a negative user comment on what is among my all time favorite movies ever, «The Texas Chainsaw Massacre» (Dilettante psychoanalyst shouldn't jump to conclusions. Disney's vibrant commendation of merit over nepotism, "The Sword in the Stone", is also part of my all time favs. And yeah, I know about that thing with the sword in a stone that's impossible to handle until you've reached an evolved step of conscience of your true self. Blew you.) at the IMDB:

« tfrizzell
United States

Date: 22 September 2000
Summary: A Total Waste of Film and Time

"The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" may be the worst excuse for a movie I have ever seen. It is vile, disgusting, sick, and ultimately stupid. Based on a true story, the movie deals with a cannibalistic family led by the chainsaw-wielding Leatherface. In the film, four young people are methodically hunted down and disposed of in brutal fashions. This is a pure mess of a film that has no message, no redeeming value, and no business even existing. (...). »

Gee, that's harsh. I bet "tfrizzel" never heard about the French movie industry.

I mean, this is vile, this is disgusting, this is sick and this is stupid. Fundamentally.

But talking about TCM, -- which despite a persistent rumor, is not based on a true story: it's very loosely inspired by the sick bastard, victim of the society fetishist and cannibal serial killer Ed Gein's life as with know it. In fact, Tobe Hooper and Kim Henkel mostly used bits and pieces (No pun intended. Okay, just a... bit... Darn! Forget about it) of Gein's story: the farm of course but also Ed's Human Bones and Skin artisanal furniture. But no chainsaw, no Texas, no hippies traveling in a Volkswagen minibus: Ed lived in Wisconsin, 1950 -- I won't mention the outstanding staging, direction, crappy photography turned into art and serving so brilliantly the ambiance of the movie and therefore its purpose. These are, after all, subject to discussion.

That said, to find "no message" in a 1974 independent movie (the important words are "independent" and "1974") staging a group of hippies suddenly confronted to a bunch of unprincipled wackos focused on the idea of hunting and eating anything that runs on two legs and utterly immune to the virtue of unilateral peace, love (Imagine all the people. In the seasoning bowl) as well as 12 years plus 19 UN resolutions (it's just an example), frankly, one has to watch this movie in a very superficial way.

Or be a former - or "neo" - love loving hippy I guess.

These poor peaceful "methodically hunted down and disposed of in brutal fashions" young people. How sick! How vile! How immoral!

Can you please put down that chainsaw and stop eating the fleshy love children of peace Mr. Leatherface?

Tell you what: I'm afraid the Texas Chainsaw Massacre's message is still cruelly valid these days.

Monday, July 28, 2003

And Then My Landlady Said:

"And there were sane and rational legal decisions by the British Government,
verily this was a sign that the End Times had come."

From The Irish Examiner

Farmer who shot burglars released today
28/07/2003 - 9:42:25 am

British farmer Tony Martin has been released from custody after serving two-thirds of his five-year jail sentence for shooting dead a 16-year-old burglar and wounding his accomplice, according to the Prison Service.

Martin, 58, today enjoys his first day of freedom after serving two-thirds of a five-year sentence for manslaughter.

He was originally jailed for life after being convicted of murdering Barras and wounding his accomplice Brendan Fearon, 33, also of Newark.

That conviction was reduced on appeal.
(Les is still thumping the microphone.)
Hello? (Thumps microphone) Can anyone hear me?