More Narcissistic Whining

The problem with being angry with one's self, as opposed to merely wallowing in self pity, is that one cannot sleep.

The problem is, or now I should say was, that I made a bad snap decision at a social event. It was a high school class reunion. I stepped up to the greeting table and picked up my name tag and then took one look at the gathered crowd. The thought then hit me in the head like a twenty-pound sledge hammer,

I DON'T BELONG HERE!

I went back out to my truck and whined to myself for about five minutes. If I had simply drove away at this point I could have returned with a minimum of fuss and bother. But what I did was to walk back into the event venue and return my name tag to the nice ladies at the greeting table, apologized, and walked away. Thus I made what is by all appearances an irreversible mistake.

The metaphysical joke here is that I registered for the event so I that wouldn't go into the self-rebuke mode for not showing up at all.